


Dancing Away with My Heart

by AnUnstoppableWarrior



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Romance, somewhat explicit language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-29
Updated: 2013-05-28
Packaged: 2017-12-13 03:18:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/819337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnUnstoppableWarrior/pseuds/AnUnstoppableWarrior
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To get away from his roommates, Mathias goes on a walk through town, but happy and painful memories come to mind as he is reminded of his first love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mathias

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Lady Antebellum's song Dancing away with my Heart.

The ground was hard beneath his feet. Snow was piled along the edges of the sidewalks and on trees, making them sparkle in the moonlight. Every breath he took was accompanied by a puff of fog. He buried his gloved hands deeper into his coat pockets.

Sometimes, walking alone on a chilly Winter night would clear his head of everything going on around him. His life wasn't exactly perfect, his roommates hated him at the moment and the increased amount of work from the college he attended was starting to stress him out.

Instead of listening to his roommates complain about him, classes, him, and their own lives(did he mention himself?), he decided to take a walk. Even though it was freezing and he had a multitude of more important things to be doing, this little walk around the small city he lived in always cleared his head.

Unfortunately, it also brought back memories, painful ones of when he'd been a young kid discovering love for the first time.

.:*^*:.

_'Come on, Mathias!' he heard, chuckling as his boyfriend waited for him to finish getting ready. 'I've been waiting to see this movie forever! I don't want to miss it,' he whined._

_Mathias raised his eyebrow at that. 'Really?' he said, straightening out from his crouched position while he tied his shoelace. 'You only knew this movie was coming out for like, what, a month? And I thought you hated scary movies?'_

_'I don't hate them, what do you think I am, some kind of wuss!' his boyfriend cried, shaking from probably more than the cold now. What horrible timing for a movie to be coming out, and one his goofball boyfriend wanted to see: when it was freezing cold outside._

_He didn't know why Alfred insisted he wasn't scared of horror movies when every time after one he was left a shaking mess. He would jump at every little noise and be paranoid for the rest of the night(as well as probably the next day) that something was in the closet, or in the shadows, just waiting to eat his brains._

_'Don't worry, Al,' Mathias said as he walked up to Alfred and put his arms around him, leaning in to say lowly, 'If you get scared I'll protect you.'_

_Alfred pouted. 'Like I need protection.' Despite his words he cuddled into Mathias's body, searching for warmth on the cold night. Mathias shook his head at his boyfriend's strangeness and placed his arm around the blond's shoulder as he started walking to the movie theater, Alfred's arm wrapping around his back in a comfortable embrace._

.:*^*:.

Mathias looked up at the movie theater as he walked past it. Had he really walked that far? The movie theater wasn't close to where he lived, on the other side of town really, he must have been very caught up in his thoughts.

He smiled sadly as more memories of the many dates he'd had with his boyfriend came to his mind. He had liked Alfred from the first day he'd met him in second grade. Alfred and his family had moved to his town after his father had died. He was very quiet and passive, both him and his brother were, but Alfred was always nice, no matter how much he was hurting.

Alfred and him had become fast friends, staying together at recess and eating lunch together, along with Matthew, Alfred's brother who was a year older than him.

As time went by Alfred had eventually gotten over his father's death and started acting normal again, or so Matthew had told him one day. Alfred had always been a happy kid, running around and laughing. After their father's passing Alfred had receded into himself. He still smiled but it wasn't the brightest he could.

The first time Alfred had truly smiled at him, not a hint of sadness in his expression, Mathias had had the sudden realization that he had a crush on Alfred; that he  _liked_  him in that way, and it scared him. Was it normal to like another boy? He always thought girls in his class looked nice, but he thought that about some of the boys too. He figured as long as it was Alfred, it was okay.

From that day on things in Mathias's mind were a little different. Every touch between them(a pat on the back, to get each others attention, a brush of the shoulders) made him blush, to varying degrees. It wasn't like him to act like that, and he wondered why being around Alfred suddenly felt like the best thing in the world(later on he would discover he was the romantic type; a surprising turn out when his childhood had been filled with mud and roughhousing).

Valentine's Day was his new favorite holiday, simply because he could confess all his feelings for Alfred anonymously, and still be his friend. The hardest part for him was determining if Alfred liked girls or boys. If he told Alfred his feelings and Alfred didn't like boys, would they cease being friends? As much as Mathias wanted to tell Alfred, he didn't want to risk losing his friendship.

.:*^*:.

_Mathias swallowed hard as he nervously held his valentine card in his hand. It was handmade, like every year, and decorated with bright colors and little hearts. He'd taped many bite-sized pieces of chocolate on it, because he knew Alfred loved chocolate, and now all he had to do was give it to him._

_Although his name wasn't on it, it would still obviously be from him if he handed it himself to Alfred. He needed to be clever about this; he couldn't let Alfred know about his feelings._

_'Hey, Mathias!' Alfred's cheerful voice made him jump, so nervous was he about somehow giving his valentine to Alfred without his knowing. He hastily shoved the card into his jacket, then turned around from where he was standing in front of his middle school, anxious about going through the day. Being a seventh grader was hard._

_'H-hey Alfred,' he stuttered, nervousness spiking now that the object of his affections was so close. 'H-how are you today?'_

_Alfred's bright smile dimmed as a worried look came over his features. 'Are you okay, Mat? Your face looks red.' Something that definitely did not help him was Alfred putting his hand on his forehead. 'Hmm, well you don't feel any different. Are you sick?' Wow, his face felt like it was on fire._

_'No, I-I'm not sick. Just...nervous about today,' he laughed, probably a little too high to seem genuine._

_Alfred blinked at him. 'Nervous? What's there to be nervous about? I love this holiday! All the free candy, it's like a second Halloween.'_

_Ah that's right. Alfred always got a lot valentines. He had a lot of other friends(though Mathias was his best) who all liked to give him cards. Sometimes people Alfred didn't even know handed him cards. He was always nice about it though, smiling and thanking them. Mathias didn't like those people._

_'But...there's another reason I like today.' Mathias refocused on Alfred as he continued talking. 'Every year I get this really nice card. It always has lots of chocolates and says really nice things, like how fun I am, or how pretty my eyes are.' Mathias's eyes widened as he saw Alfred blush, ducking his head as if_ _embarrassed. That was his card, it had to be!_

_'Do you know who it's from?' he asked, heart racing. Alfred shook his head. 'No, there's never a name_ _on it.' Alfred sighed, rubbing at his cheeks, 'Ugh, I like Valentine's Day but the mushy, lovey-dovey stuff is so embarrassing.'_

_The bell rung, a warning to get to class before the final bell rang. Alfred smiled at Mathias. 'Come on buddy, we're going to be late!' Then he was off to class._

_Mathias stood frozen as one word rang through his head. 'L-Love?'_

.:*^*:.

Mathias chuckled as he thought about how nervous he'd been around Alfred. He should have just gone with the flow of life and known that everything would have turned out alright.

In eighth grade he realized that it might look suspicious if Alfred kept getting similar valentines every year. Not a lot of kids who had gone to their elementary and middle schools were going to the same high school. If he wanted to remain anonymous he had to change the style of his valentines.

As painful as it was seeing Alfred sad, he didn't make a card that year. Alfred had been happy when the day started, but as it went on he was obviously down about something. After the bell rang to end school, he'd even stopped in front of the school, as if the person giving him all those nice valentines would present themselves. When nobody came up to him after a minute or two, he and Mathias had walked home(they lived close to each other, only two houses separating theirs).

Mathias had almost blurted out he was the person making Alfred's cards, if only to wipe the saddened look off of Alfred's face, but he refrained. It would be worth it next year, their freshmen year of High School, to see Alfred's face when the valentines started again, better than before.

Mathias stopped in front of the bookstore he'd visited to pick up books on poetry(and romance). When February rolled around, he had made what he believed to be the perfect valentine. It was simple, a rectangular card that, when opened, revealed one heart shaped piece of chocolate and a poem. Being so young still, he'd started with something easy. He'd written about Alfred's eyes, how blue they were, a beautiful color he'd never seen before, and how they changed with his moods, flawlessly matching all his expressions.

Since they had lockers, he had the perfect opportunity to slip the note inside Alfred's without him seeing. He'd been there when Alfred had opened his locker and the card had fluttered to the ground. With a confused look on his face, Alfred had picked up the card and after reading the poem, blushed but smiled.

Mathias had asked him what he had there, in a teasing way since he already knew, but Alfred had avoided the question.

That card had sparked Mathias's need to continue telling Alfred his feelings, little by little. He began leaving more cards, little notes and poems confessing his desires. Seeing Alfred's reactions just spurred him on, until he took a chance beginning of junior year and asked if Alfred would meet with him.

.:*^*:.

_Somehow, every year, they managed to get lockers right next to each other, or close by. This year their lockers were on the same end of the hall, just on opposite sides. This actually worked to Mathias's advantage in the moment. He was trying to calm his breathing, and not look like a lovestruck moron as he slyly gazed at Alfred's back._

_He'd come to school earlier than normal to put his latest note in Alfred's locker. Only this time, the note_ _asked to meet._

_Mathias was very wary about this but was determined to tell Alfred how he felt. And he knew, somehow,_ _that if Alfred didn't see him that way, or didn't like guys, they would still be friends. Alfred had nothing against homosexuals; last year he had defended a gay couple from the jocks' teasing, calling them bullies and immature. If it was anyone else the jocks probably would have ignored them, but Alfred was popular because of his kindness and openness, his ability to see the good in people and accept them. The main jock had simply glared and turned around, his buddies following behind._

_'Mathias! Mathias!' he heard. He turned around again to see Alfred grinning, the light blush he got from reading the notes present on his face. 'My admirer asked to meet!' He looked so happy and embarrassed at the same time. It made Mathias's heart melt._

_'Oh yeah?' he said, feigning innocence, 'Are you gonna show?'_

_Alfred looked down at the note in his hand, brushing his thumb over the signature: a small heart. 'I...don't know, to be honest. These notes have been happening for so long, I never thought about meeting the person behind them. I know who I want it to be but...'_

_Taking a huge risk, Mathias asked, 'What if it's a guy?'_

_Alfred's brows furrowed as his smile dropped. 'I've thought about that but...I don't think it'll be a problem.' Alfred's smile returned as he grabbed his books and put the note in his backpack. 'I guess I'll find out later today, huh? I think I will go. Are you doin' anything after school?' Mathias almost wanted to simultaneously laugh and cry at their situation._

_'Uh, yeah, I've got...uh...some school work I need to catch up on, you know...gotta get those grades up!'_

_'Uh-huh, sure,' Alfred smiled, saying goodbye and walking towards his class._

.:*^*:.

Mathias walked by both the flower shop he'd gotten flowers for Alfred at and the diner where they had their first date. With a sad smile he remembered all the good times they had together, all the laughs and moments they shared. Confessing to Alfred had been the smartest decision of his life.

The note had asked to meet by one of the back entrances to school, the one the least amount of people used. He'd said to wait several minutes to make sure everyone else was gone so there would be no confusion.

He had waited by the door so when Alfred came out no one would be there. When that had happened, Mathias had taken a deep breath and walked up behind Alfred, flowers clutched in his shaking hand.

.:*^*:.

_The door next to him opened and Alfred walked through, stopping a few feet from it when he spotted nobody there._ Now or never, _he told himself. Clutching the flowers he'd run to purchase for this occasion, he slowly walked up behind him._

_'Alfred?' he called._

_Alfred froze where he was. He recognized that voice, and when he slowly turned around, Mathias was standing behind him, flowers outstretched as an offering. Mathias, his best friend since forever, holding flowers out to him._

_'M-Mathias, what are you doing...?'_

_Mathias's face was on fire again, no doubt super red. 'Alfred, I'm the one giving you all those notes.'_

_Alfred looked at him in shocked disbelief, then looked down at the flowers in his hands, a smile coming to his face. He gently took them and brought a hand up to rub the soft petals of the sunflowers._

_'I remember you told me a long time ago that sunflowers were your favorite flower because of a childhood friend of yours. He liked them a lot and so you started liking them as well, right? I know they're not romantic or anything but I though getting those instead of roses or something would be better.' Mathias sighed and continued rambling,'Look Alfred, I know this must be weird for you, what with the flowers and the sudden confession, but I just had to tell you how I felt, and I couldn't wait for—'_

_'Mathias,' Alfred said, voice gentle. Mathias stopped talking instantly, looking almost embarrassed. Still smiling and rubbing the sunflower petals, Alfred asked, 'How long have you felt this way?'_

_'The first time I laid eyes on you I liked you, all the way back in second grade,' he responded, only giving a short answer to avoid rambling again._

_Alfred looked thoughtful as he shouldered off his backpack, sunflowers clutched securely to his chest. 'Were you the one who made all those valentine cards as well? Now that I think about it, it's kind of obvious that there was a connection between getting the same type of valentine card and having the same best friend throughout school,' Alfred said, amused smile on his face._

_Mathias laughed nervously, resisting the urge to rub the back of his head and neck in embarrassment. 'Yeeeahhh, I realized that in eighth grade, which is why I didn't give you a card that year. To, ya know, throw off any suspicion.'_

_Features hardening in determination, Mathias stepped closer to Alfred. 'I know this must be strange, but I want to be with you, as more than just friends. Will you go out with me?' His heart was beating so quickly he was surprised he didn't have a heart attack._

_'Yes.'_

_Mathias didn't know if he had heard right. 'Y-Yes?' Alfred was smiling widely now._

_'Yes! I'll go out with you.'_

_Mathias didn't know what to do. He let out a small laugh, then more and more as he realized Alfred had_ agreed _. A bright smile crossed his face as he closed the distance between them, wrapped his arms around Alfred's waist, lifted him off the ground and spun him._

_'Thank you!' he cried._

.:*^*:.

Mathias walked through a park on his return trip home. The park was a fairly popular one, many couples having spent days relaxing there. One thing that had surprised him, when he noticed it, was that he and Alfred had never dated anyone before each other.

It wasn't because they were weird, or cast into the "nerd" shadow, or undesirable. Quite the opposite, in fact. Mathias had grown up nicely with a strong build and skills to match it. He became a member of their high school soccer team and excelled at it, quickly becoming the VIP. As a result, he had had many girls come up to him and ask if he was busy. He'd politely declined them all, of course; he only had eyes for Alfred.

Alfred too was frequently asked out, though he had also declined every invitation. For the longest time, Mathias didn't know why Alfred turned his suitors away(though he was happy every time it happened). Mathias knew why  _he_  did, his heart already belonged to Alfred, but Alfred never talked about that part of his life.

Mathias wondered if people saw the same aspects of Alfred as he did.  _Did_  they see a nerd whenever Alfred started talking about comics and science and space? Did they see Alfred at the library, engrossed in a good book and think, ' _my God, he's beautiful.'_?

When Mathias questioned him, on numerous occasions, Alfred would just say he wasn't interested in them. At first, Mathias thought Alfred  _was_  gay, since he'd turned down all the girls who'd asked him out. Then he thought maybe Alfred actually wasn't interested in women  _or_  men, as when a couple brave guys at school asked him out he declined them as well.

It was when they were in senior year he learned why Alfred had rejected all those people.

.:*^*:.

_It was winter break, which meant little homework and two weeks off of school. Alfred, being the more school oriented one of their duo, had urged Mathias to get his homework done early, so he could relax the entire break and not stress himself out more. He'd even offered to help Mathias in any subjects he needed help with._

_Alfred was incredibly smart when it came to history, science, and math. He absolutely loved space and was thinking about going into a science career, if he could. Mathias was more sport oriented and only took the necessary classes to pass while he focused on sports. He was hoping to get in on a scholarship, as his soccer coach kept urging him to apply._

_The result of finishing his homework early was more time relaxing and more importantly, more time to spend with Alfred._

_They were seated on the couch in Alfred's living room, his mom out shopping and his brother in another state entirely, having already graduated and moved on to college._

_Alfred was laying in between his legs as they watched some space show Alfred was interested in. Mathias had taken to running his hands gently through Alfred's hair instead of paying attention to the program on TV. During a commercial break, Mathias asked a question that had been on his mind for quite awhile._

_'Hey Al?' he started, continuing when Alfred gave a hum of acknowledgment, 'How come you've never dated anyone else but me? Don't get me wrong, I was super happy when you turned people away, but I always wondered.'_

_Alfred twisted around in his hold so he was facing Mathias from between his legs, elbows coming up on Mathias's stomach to rest his head on his hands. 'Weeeellll,' Alfred said, sly smile on his face, 'I thought it was obvious? Why don't you take a guess?'_

_Mathias racked his brain for any indicator as to why Alfred wouldn't want to date anyone before him. But, he couldn't think of a reason. 'I don't know, you're...uh, a prude?' Alfred had a mock look of disbelief on his face as he lightly smacked Mathias on the shoulder._

_'What did you just say,' he laughed, 'I am_ so _not a prude, do you need a demonstration as to why?' Was Mathias imagining the seductive undertone of the last part of that sentence?_

_'Alright alright, just answer the question, no more stalling.'_

_Alfred brought his hands up to rest against Mathias's cheeks. 'Mathias, the reason why I turned down everyone who asked me out is because I already liked someone.'_

_Mathias's brows furrowed, 'Okay, but you went out with me when I asked.' Alfred raised his eyebrows and nodded encouragingly, as if he was on the right track to something. 'Wait,' Mathias said, sitting up slightly in his realization, 'you...liked...me?'_

_'Mathias, baby, I know you like sports more than schoolwork, but you have to have some brains in that thick head of yours,' Alfred said._

_'I...wh-hey! What's that suppose to mean?' Alfred laughed outright at Mathias's pout._

_'Mathias, I didn't like you, I_ do _like you; I have for a long time.'_

_'...Really? Since when?' Mathias had no idea about this; not only did Alfred never talk about anyone he liked(for good reason though, as he was starting to realize), he'd never shown any interest to be more than best friends with Mathias._

_'Hmm, I'd say the crush started in middle school, sixth grade I think.'_

_'What!'_

.:*^*:.

As he walked closer to his apartment, he thought about the end of senior year(the senior dance), and the end of the following summer. He and Alfred hadn't told anyone at school they were dating each other, not even their other close friends. They didn't feel the need to broadcast their relationship to a bunch of kids who wouldn't understand. There were only subtle differences to how they acted before and after Mathias asked Alfred out.

They still stayed glued at the hip, as they'd been all their lives, only sometimes Mathias would put an arm around Alfred's shoulder, or let a touch linger longer than normal. Alfred would sometimes lean into Mathias if they were sitting side by side, or help Mathias keep his wild hairstyle somewhat neat, whereas before they would have been too embarrassed to do that to each other.

Based on that, they had decided to skip out on the senior dance. Their friends were very unsupportive of this decision, constantly urging them to change their minds, but they remained adamant.

Their high school wasn't against same sex couples going together, but that wasn't the problem. It was simply the reaction other students might have and their want of a nice, quiet night filled with no conflict.

Instead of attending the dance, they stayed at Mathias's house. He was an only child and his parent's happened to be away for a vacation, leaving his house conveniently empty.

The night of senior dance saw them setting up their own little celebration of graduating high school. Except, Alfred had something very important to tell him; something that made him incredibly happy for Alfred yet also filled him with a crushing sadness.

.:*^*:.

_Music softly drifted through the house as the couple slow danced. They were hugging, Alfred resting his head against Mathias's shoulder. Senior year was coming to an end, and this peaceful night could possibly be the last dance they had together._

_Alfred was a smart kid; he got As in all his classes(maybe a B or two freshmen year) and was heading for one of the best science and space colleges in the country. The only problem was that it was in another state, on the other side of the country._

_Alfred had not told any of this to Mathias yet. He didn't want to leave Mathias but he didn't want to give up on his dreams either. Every time he thought about leaving and Mathias's reaction his heart felt like it was being stabbed repeatedly with a burning knife._

_Slowly, he slid his hands, which had been resting on Mathias's shoulders, up to the back of his neck and laced his fingers there. He lifted his head to stare the man in the eyes, much like his own just_ _shades darker and mixed with green, like a tropical ocean._

_Mathias looked at Alfred and saw the sadness in his eyes. 'What's wrong?' he asked, still swaying_ _slightly with the music._

_'I...there's something I need to tell you,' Alfred whispered, unwilling to disturb the serene peace they had. He did however, stop their swaying._

_'Go on,' Mathias urged, just as quietly. Alfred took a deep breath. 'I've been looking at colleges, and recently I was accepted into a really good one; best science and space program in the country. It looks really promising and I know I'll find my dream there, but...' This was way harder in person. He'd thought about what he wanted to say and how to break the news the Mathias but now that he was doing it it was so much harder._

_He wasn't one for tears, even when his dad died he hadn't cried that much(though he had been listless and lethargic), but he could feel them, building in his eyes and threatening to spill over._

_'...but, it's in another state, isn't it?' Mathias finished._

_Alfred buried his face in Mathias's neck as he started crying, pushed over the edge by the sadness in Mathias's voice._

_'I-I don't want t-t-to leave you, Mathias. I l-love you, but I-I...I c-can't—' 'Shh, shh, please don't cry, you know what happens when you do,' Mathias interrupted, voice quivering. Alfred looked up to see Mathias smiling with tears running down his own cheeks. 'You know crying makes me cry too.'_

_Mathias brought one hand up to rub Alfred's head in a soothing manner, tightening his other arm's grip around Alfred's waist in a comforting hug._

_'Alfred, I love you, but I want you to be happy. If this college makes you happy in the long run then so be it. We don't know how long we'll last; if you give up a chance at your future for something that might fall apart, you'll regret it, no matter how much you want it right now.'_

_'But-but—!' Alfred was silenced by Mathias's lips on his own, the kiss short before Mathias pulled away to continue talking. 'No buts, Alfred. I'm happy for you; you deserve to go to this college and be successful, you've worked so hard to get there. Don't let me and our emotions get in your way.'_

_Alfred stared at Mathias, tears still leaking out of his eyes without his permission. 'Mathias...' he said softly, then leaned in to kiss him again, desperate to touch and feel Mathias._

_The kiss was filled with desperation and sadness, even as their bodies started heating up, being pressed so close together. They separated only to go at it again, and again. Slowly, they made their way to Mathias's room, Alfred falling backwards on the bed and pulling Mathias on top of him._

_That night they made love for the first time._

.:*^*:.

Mathias stopped in front of his door. The night of senior dance when he and Alfred had had sex for the first time had been the greatest and saddest night of his life. If anything, the course their night took had been as a way to comfort the both of them; Alfred for his decision to leave and Mathias for having to lose his love.

As he unlocked his door, blissfully silent as his roommates were asleep, he wondered where Alfred was now. Was he a scientist? Was he working with NASA? Was he single or did he have a boyfriend? Girlfriend?

The thought of someone else being with Alfred hurt, but he knew he shouldn't be jealous. Alfred had left four years ago, of course there was the possibility he might have moved on. Just because Mathias was having trouble keeping a new relationship didn't mean Alfred would be too.

Either way, he was still happy for Alfred. And even if he did manage to enter into a steady relationship, he knew that, deep down, he'd always love Alfred.


	2. Alfred

The ground was hard beneath his feet. Every step seemed to echo in the deserted forest he was in. His breathing was rapid as he fled in fear.  _Find a place to hide,_  had become a mantra in his mind, set on repeat as he looked for cover. The... _beast_  tracking him couldn't be far behind.

When he'd first entered the forest, he'd been pumped up, but everything had quickly spiraled out of control. All his friends were dead, the stain from where they'd been taken out visible in places as he fled in fear. He knew it was cowardly, but if he could just find somewhere to hide he could organize his thoughts...

He was struck in the back, next to his spine luckily, and the force of the hit made him trip and fall. The wind was knocked out of him as the gun in his hands was shoved into his solar plexus. As he struggled to breath between the hit to his front and back, a shadow came over him.

"Dammit," he growled. "Why the hell did you have to hit me in the back you jackass! I can already feel the bruise."

The person standing over him snorted. "Suck it up Jones, don't be such a pussy."

"Fuck you Gilbert, that was a cheap shot and you know it." Alfred supported his body with his arms as he sat up, paint ball gun lying uselessly at his side. "You better watch your back, prick," Alfred growled, slowly getting into position to take revenge on Gilbert.

"Oh, yeah?" Gilbert taunted, his tone clearly implying he had nothing to worry about. "What are you gonna—" He was cut short by his legs getting kicked from under him. He cursed as he lost his balance and tumbled to the ground, a weight now on his stomach.

Alfred had taken the opportunity to straddle Gilbert and smirked down at him. "What was that?" he said, his voice sickly sweet.

Gilbert narrowed his eyes but made no move to get Alfred off him. " _That_  was a cheap shot," he muttered. Alfred only shook his head as he leaned down to stare Gilbert in the eye. "Now you know how it feels," he said lowly.

He started leaning away but was caught by surprise when Gilbert grabbed his shirt and flipped their positions, pinning  _him_  to the ground. Now it was Gilbert's turn to smirk.

"Oh I could get used to this," he purred. Alfred scowled.

"Cut it out Gil, you know—" "Yeah yeah," Gilbert interrupted, letting go of Alfred's arms and getting off of him, "I know, you already have a boyfriend, blah blah blah, whatever," Gilbert mumbled, going over to his paint ball gun and scooping it up before heading back over to Alfred and offering him a hand. Alfred eyed him suspiciously then decided to take the offering, regretting it immediately when Gilbert just pulled him closer.

"When you get tired of this no show and want a real man, I'll be waiting, ya got it?" Gilbert breathed in his ear. Alfred frowned for a split second before a smile appeared on his lips. He gently tugged Gilbert's hands off of him and said, "Great, you can give me Ludwig's number." Gilbert's expression darkened considerably, going from seductive to dissatisfied in an instant.

"Damn, teasing, son of a—" A call in the distance made him pause. They both turned toward where the yell had come from(Alfred with a smug look on his face and Gilbert with a sour one), and after a little while their friends approached them.

Their teams were short since their other friends were "damn crybabies"(in Gilbert's words), only four on each side. Gilbert's brother Ludwig was on his team, as well as one of his best friends Antonio, and the older brother to a girl who usually hung out with him, Antonio, Francis, and two Italian brothers, Daan.

On Alfred's side he had Ivan, a childhood friend of his who he was surprised and overjoyed to discover went to his college, one of his best friends Kiku, and his grumpy dorm neighbor Arthur. Arthur and Kiku had been less enthusiastic about playing than Alfred and Ivan had been, but they were easily swayed by Alfred's puppy dog look.

One little problem to their teams was that they didn't quite like each other. Gilbert didn't like Ivan and Arthur didn't like Gilbert. Kiku didn't like anyone on the enemy's team when he got engrossed in a game. Alfred and Antonio liked everyone(well not  _everyone, Alfred and Gilbert had trouble getting along, as did Antonio and Arthur),_ while Daan and Ludwig were indifferent. They liked their teammates and didn't like their enemies, and it would have been the same even if their teams were switched up.

Ludwig, Kiku, and Antonio came from one direction as a group while Ivan, Arthur, and Daan came from other directions, by themselves. They were all in various states of taking their armor off and inspecting their bruises, or where a likely one would form.

Ludwig raised an eyebrow at their expressions. "Who was shot?" he asked, bring out a small notebook from his inside coat pocket. At the reminder that he lost, Alfred's smug look melted away as he raised his hand. "I was—" Arthur cursed their luck, Kiku shook and lowered his head, and Ivan glared at the other team, "—but it was totally a cheap shot. He got me in the back! While I was running away!" It seemed his team hated losing as much as he did.

As his friends started arguing amongst themselves, Alfred thought back to his and Gilbert's confrontation, and the little white lie he had told to all his friends when he first moved to the east coast. At that time he'd still been in love with the boyfriend he had to leave, and to protect himself he had told them they were still boyfriends, even though they'd decided to break up, if only to try and make things easier for themselves.

.:(*^*):.

_The airport was practically empty when they walked in. Alfred was clutching a suitcase in one hand and Mathias's hand in his other. Mathias had his duffel bag slung over one shoulder and his other suitcase._

_Alfred had already said goodbye to his mother in the days leading up to his departure, and though he had spent all summer with Mathias, he still had to say his final goodbye._

_Mathias obtained a pass to go through security so he could stay with Alfred until the last second. They didn't talk to each other until they were seated by Alfred's gate, the warm, comforting hold of each other's hands enough for them at the moment._

_Alfred sat his carry on bag in front of their legs and they cuddled close together, desperate for the heat the other radiated. They had about thirty minutes left before Alfred's plane would be boarding and they might never see each other again._

_'Just remember,' Mathias said, rubbing Alfred's shoulder, 'everything will turn out okay, you'll see. You'll make friends fast and easy and your schooling will go great and you'll be happy—' 'Happy?' Alfred whispered, then louder, 'Happy? Mathias, how can I be happy if you're not there with me? How can I be happy if...if...' Fuck, hadn't he cried enough already? As he rubbed his arm across his eyes, Mathias turned toward him and pulled his arm down to clasp both of Alfred's hands in his own._

_'Listen Alfred, you shouldn't upset yourself so much, it's not healthy. You're going to be fine, trust me,' he said gently. 'You're going to go to college and get a great job doing something you love and you're going to find new love and possibly get married and there will be children and getting old and_ happiness _.'_

 _Alfred was crying again, shoulders shaking as he sobbed out, 'B-but, i-i wa-want all tho-ose things w-with_ you _, M-Mathias. I w-want to b-be hap-ppy with y-yo-u an-nd g-grow o-o-old w-with you and...' The rest of Alfred's sentence was drowned out by his sobs._

_Mathias felt tears coming to his eyes, like they did every time Alfred was so obviously upset by something._

_Alfred's flight was called for boarding and Mathias quickly cupped both of Alfred's cheeks to get him to pay attention. 'Just remember what we talked about, okay? No matter how much you want to talk to me, or hear from me, you must resist. We decided it would be better to go our separate ways and we have to stick by it.'_

_The final call sounded over the intercom and so Mathias pulled Alfred's face to his for one last kiss. It was desperate and he could tell Alfred didn't want it to end by the way he was clutching onto his shirt but he had to pull away, lest Alfred miss his flight. He wiped the tears off of Alfred's cheeks with his thumbs. 'I love you,' he said quietly._

_Alfred brought his hand up to wipe away Mathias's own tears. 'I love you too,' he said, voice quivering as he almost started crying again._

_He stood up with Mathias's urging, picked up his bag, and walked over to the gate, handing the attendant his ticket as he looked back at Mathias for possibly the last time. He waved gently and Mathias waved back, bright smile coming to his face. Alfred smiled back though he was a mess on the inside and turned away, walking through the gate and leaving his heart behind._

.:(*^*):.

He'd long since been able to think about Mathias and not cry, but he still felt as though part of his heart was missing. He'd panicked when he was first hit on by someone in his college and had told them he had a boyfriend. The guy had apologized but said he couldn't help himself and that his boyfriend was very lucky. That was another reason why he kept up with his lie.

He wasn't stupid. He knew he had good looks, that people were interested in him and wanted him  _that way_ , but he couldn't start a new relationship when he knew he would be leading the other on. Deep down he would always be in love with Mathias, even if he was tempted to sleep around, though he beat back those thoughts.

Even know, walking back to where their cars were parked and watching his friends argue, he wouldn't mind sleeping with five out of the seven of them. Arthur was already in a relationship, no matter how many times he denied it, and Kiku was his best friend, so they were a no. And even though he was friends with Ivan, Antonio, and sometimes Gilbert, he knew he wouldn't be bothered sleeping with them, nor Ludwig and Daan.

There was something about them and how they carried themselves that reminded him of Mathias. Well, Mathias when they started high school and he joined the soccer team.

.:(*^*):.

_Alfred walked through the emptying halls as he headed toward the PE fields. Students were clearing out of the school quickly now that the final bell had rung, eager to get away from the school as soon as possible. Alfred wouldn't leave without his friend though, so he had to make his way to the soccer field, where Mathias was training for an upcoming game._

_Alfred hadn't seen him play yet but apparently he was a natural at it, if what his friend had told him at lunch was true. Supposedly, the coach had been so blown away at Mathias's skills he had dropped to his knees and proclaimed to the heavens that they were saved. Mathias was officially on the team the next day, jerseys and everything already sorted out._

_Alfred didn't know much about soccer. He wasn't really interested in participating in physical sports himself, though he tried his best for a high PE grade, but he enjoyed watching them, especially when his best friend and crush was on the team._

_As he walked onto the bleachers overlooking the soccer field he suddenly flushed. The only other people on the bleachers were girls, open textbooks on their laps but their eyes focused on the players. Is that what he looked like? Some blushing sophomore ogling the soccer players? Of course he knew it wasn't like that(well it kind of was, but Mathias had been his best friend before his crush), and Mathias knew it wasn't like that, so who cared what anyone else thought. Alfred could cheer his friend on if he wanted._

_Yes, it was perfectly normal to watch his friend practice something he liked, the confidence in his eyes as he stole the ball from someone, the way his shorts and shirt slid up his body when he block tackled a player, and wow, had he been working out? He looked good from a distance, Alfred wondered why Mathias hadn't told him about it, or let him feel, because his mind was definitely going in that direction._

_He blushed hard at his thoughts and slapped a hand to his face._ Wow, Al, just wow, that's exactly what best friends do, let their buddy feel 'm up.

_Alfred sighed, placing his hand in his lap and willing his blush away as best he could. He wondered if there was any way Mathias could ever return his feelings, if he even liked guys. Alfred never talked about crushes or relationships with Mathias, and so never asked Mathias about his love life, or lack of one. Like him, Mathias had never been with someone, and although he knew he had slim chances, he desperately hoped that, somehow, they could be together._

.:(*^*):.

The walk back to the cars wasn't too long, since when Alfred had been running and Gilbert chasing him they'd been heading towards the cars. Ivan, Alfred, Arthur, and Kiku all went to Ivan's car, as they attended the same college and, strangely, the same dorm building. Ludwig and Gilbert went to Ludwig's car as Daan and Antonio went to their own cars.

Moving to a new state with only a little money to get him situated made getting around difficult. Luckily, and to both of their shock and happiness, Ivan was attending the same college and had a car.

Ivan was someone he thought he'd never see again. They'd been good childhood friends living in the same neighborhood on the west coast. Back then, Ivan had been very quiet and shy, and Alfred had been loud and liked to play outside, 24 hours a day. Both their fathers had been good friends and were important to their community, so they'd spent a lot of time together.

Then the accident happened. It left Alfred's father dead and both boys with damaged eyes, corrective lenses now needed to see properly. His mother had decided to move, no longer able to live in the town without painful memories being present. Ivan and him had been sad of course, but they were just children, they would get over it. As a way to never forget each other, Alfred made sunflowers(Ivan's favorite flower) his favorite as well, and Ivan kept with him always a little bracelet Alfred had made. It was decorated with blue and purple beads(for their eyes) unevenly distributed with hearts and stars thrown in(hearts because they were such good friends and stars because Alfred liked stars).

When it got too small for his wrist his mother had converted it into a key chain, which let him clip it anywhere until he started carrying keys with him.

Even now, as Alfred settled into the front seat and Arthur and Kiku slid into the back seat, he could see the charm hanging from the main ring holding Ivan's keys together, the string faded from its pure white to a dirty cream color and the beads with scratches on them.

The problem he had to overcome now was the memories of what happened  _after_  he'd moved up north and started second grade at a new school, with new people and new friends.

.:(*^*):.

_Alfred stood in the living room of their new house. It was colder than where they previously lived, so he and Matthew were bundled up until they could hardly move. Their mother was crouching in front of them and fixing their clothes for their first day at the school, Alfred going to second grade and Matthew to third grade._

_Though Alfred was the younger brother, he was(outwardly) dealing with their father's passing much better than Matthew._

_'Matthew,' their mother said gently, brushing his hair out of his face and bringing both of them into a hug. When she pulled back she looked at him. 'I want you to be strong for your little brother okay? Don't be afraid to talk to the other kids and I know you'll find friends soon."_

_She smiled when Matthew nodded and Alfred slipped his gloved hand into his brother's. She gave them another kiss on their foreheads then put on her own coat and took Matthew's hand to lead her boys outside. She locked the door and started walking her sons to their new school._

_'Now remember,' she said as they stopped at the entrance to the school, 'be strong, be yourselves, and I know you'll have a good day, and make friends, alright? Love you boys.'_

_'Love you too mama,' they said in unison. She smiled and left, the two young boys turning towards their new school and, hand in hand, started their day._

_It was at the recess during lunch that Alfred and Matthew met a little boy. Or rather, they were forced to meet, as the boy and Alfred ran right into each other. They both fell on their bottoms with a startled yelp, and Matthew, fearing that his brother might start crying, bent down to help him._

_Neither boy started crying though, Alfred standing up thanks to his brother's help and rubbing his forehead, which had collided with the other boy's when they ran into each other, and the other boy rubbing his forehead as well, though he remained on the ground._

_Matthew crouched down next to the other boy and asked if he was alright, holding out a hand for him as well. The other boy gave an affirmative and grabbed the hand in front of his face so he could be hauled into a standing position. He was still rubbing his head when he looked at the boy who helped him up, then the one standing next to him, who was also rubbing his head still._

_'Sorry about hitting you like that. My mommy says I need to watch were I'm going better,' the boy said._

_'That's okay, I'm fine,' Alfred said, dropping his hand and smiling slightly at the boy. 'Are you okay?' he asked._

_The boy dropped his hand as well, only he was transfixed by the color of the eyes across from him. He leaned closer as he said, 'Whooooa, your eyes are so pretty!' Apparently the kid had a short attention span; he was acting like he hadn't just knocked foreheads with a stranger. He turned towards the taller boy._

_'Thanks for helping me up,' he said, then smiled brightly and held out both hands, one for each brother. 'I know! Wanna be friends? My name's Mathias.'_

_Alfred and Matthew looked at each other then grabbed Mathias's hands._

_'Sure,' Alfred said, 'My name's Alfred.'_

_'I'm Matthew,' Matthew said shyly._

_'Great!' Mathias said, starting to drag them over to the school's playground, 'I know we will be good friends!'_

.:(*^*):.

He would never forget the comfort that his friendship with Mathias provided. Not only did Mathias fill the void that had opened up when he was forced to leave Ivan, but as he grew older and really starting to come to terms about his father's death and the accident, Mathias was there for him.

They arrived at the dorms and headed off to their respective rooms, thoughts of laying down or soaking their bruises going through their heads. Ivan's dorm was on the floor above his and Kiku's on the floor below his, while Arthur's was directly across from his. He had to listen to Arthur's muttered complaining about how much of a pain in the ass Gilbert was all the way to his door. Alfred just shook his head.

He said good bye to Arthur and unlocked and opened his door, letting it swing shut behind him. The sight and smell of his room sent a familiar comfort over him as he collapsed onto his bed and just laid there, suddenly too tired to move. He ached in places all over his body and was feeling very comfortable lying in the middle of his bed. Unfortunately his cell phone buzzed, signaling a text, and if it was who he thought it was he'd better answer or else suffer a string of annoying buzzes as his friend(that word was being used loosely here) tried to get his attention.

It was Gilbert, like he'd guessed, inviting him to go out drinking with "the boys". That sounded incredibly unappealing to him at the moment, so he gave some excuse about calling his boyfriend, which always ended up as a lengthy conversation and therefore making him unavailable. How convenient for him and troublesome for Gilbert.

Gilbert's response was drenched in sarcasm but Alfred paid it no mind, choosing to let the conversation go at that. So what if he didn't want to go to a bar and be hit on by drunk men and women, or stared at or have drinks bought for him. If he didn't want to feel like some possession to be wooed than dammit he had the right to refuse without all the sassy lip in response.

He sighed and turned over onto his back, staring up at his ceiling. That was something Mathias had never made him feel like: an object. Unlike Gilbert, Mathias would defend him instead of participate in the lechery, would protect him instead of throw him to the dogs. To make his life easier he kept up his boyfriend charade but deep down he was hurting, and the one person who could heal him was the one person he was supposed to forget about.

.:(*^*):.

_Mornings now held the joyful realization that he was in a relationship with his long-time crush. Though they couldn't sleep together(in the literal sense) and therefore couldn't wake together, content in the other's embrace, the warmth from knowing they belonged to each other now was a good enough substitute._

_As odd as it was to think, he couldn't wait to get to school. Well maybe not for learning's sake, but still. His mother had to constantly advise him to slow down his eating or he might choke, then he finished getting ready and was out the door far earlier than he'd ever been._

_Since they'd decided not to broadcast their relationship, meeting in the morning well before school started was one way they could openly be together(even if they didn't do anything risqué) without the risk of the other students finding out and possibly spreading the news, gossipy little bastards they were._

_The warning bell sounded and they were forced apart, not many classes shared between them. Alfred took academic classes, and advanced ones at that, while Mathias took PE and Weightlifting, then whatever the basics were for graduating. As a result he had a free period at the end of the day, which he used to practice on the soccer field. He was very dedicated to the sport and Alfred could appreciate that quality; dedication was something that he was fairly familiar with, after all it wasn't easy pursuing the sciences._

_As he grew older, it wasn't hard to notice the looks some of his fellow students cast his way, and he hated that, especially since he had a boyfriend now. He was in the strange position of being a "nerd", based upon what he liked to do and what the popular kids' definition of a nerd was, yet he was eyed by the same popular girls. Disregarding what he did or what he liked, he was handsome to those girls and so the "cool" light was forceful shown upon him._

_Girls flirted with him all the time and the popular guys(especially the jocks) were jealous, which put him, undeservedly, on their bad side. But those girls with all their superficial comments and absolute ignorance of what he was really like made him feel disgusted and repulsed. Perhaps it was because he liked Mathias in a romantic way, but complements and flirting from Mathias never made him feel like that._

_Of course, to be fair, some of the less popular girls, some he might even consider a friend, had also flirted with him. They were infinitely more knowledgeable about him than the most popular girls could ever hope to be, yet their attention was unwanted and unneeded, but of course, no one knew Alfred was already taken._

.:(*^*):.

Just as he was about to fall asleep, his bed never having felt so comfortable and welcoming, his phone buzzed again. Hoping it wasn't Gilbert, he opened the text message.

From: Gilbert  
convinced a friend 2 spend his bday w/ the party master! u should come since he doesnt have any friends over here. be at the usual bar next saturday be4 2 o clock got it?

Huh. Gilbert was inviting him to a party next weekend to celebrate one of his buddy's birthdays. As he sat his phone down, too tired to reply coherently, the last thought that crossed his mind as he fell asleep was,  _Isn't Mathias's birthday next week?_


	3. Together

The rest of the week passed without incident and in no time it was Saturday, and later that night would be the party at a popular club his group of friends liked to frequent. Though he was tempted to skip out on the party, he knew Gilbert would hound him for a month about being "totally unawesome", should he decline the invitation. It wasn't like he didn't want to go, he loved meeting new people and all, he just wasn't in the mood. Maybe he wouldn't go after all, call Gilbert and say he was feeling ill and was too swamped with school work to be out partying. Gilbert should understand, maybe he'd only be bothered for a day or two.

He decided calling would make the conversation more sincere, so he called Gilbert up and told him an excuse, though one not entirely untrue; he  _was_  a little behind on his work and he was also not feeling too well right then. Gilbert tried to guilt him into going but Alfred was adamant about declining, he even said "please" to show how serious he was being. Gilbert agreed(with a few sarcastic remarks thrown in) and Alfred said goodbye, and thank you, which was probably a word Gilbert didn't hear a lot directed at him.

Settling down on his bed with his studies and a warm drink sounded good so he gathered up his books from his desk and set them on his bed, ready to have a nice, relaxing night by himself.

* * *

The club was impressive, much more modern and high tech than any other club Mathias had been to. The lights were strobing and the bass was strong enough to be felt through the floor. It was crowded because it was a Saturday night, but that didn't mean it was no less enjoyable. Mathias actually had a pretty good time.

Gilbert had picked him up at the airport and driven him to his place(most likely just Ludwig's place; he knew it was probably only Ludwig's name on the lease). There he met Gilbert's younger brother, who looked exactly like what Gilbert described: tall, muscular, and very stern-faced. He was polite though, and Mathias and him were able to have a pleasant conversation to get to know one another while Gilbert lamented the loss of the friend he'd been expecting("What the hell is this? Where's the party animal I met in college, huh?").

Though they were originally at the club for his birthday, Mathias was more than happy to focus on something other than his life and let everyone do their own thing. He made sure to not drink too much, unlike Gilbert and two of his friends, who were going around the club and hitting on various individuals. He danced and talked and stayed pleasantly buzzed, which came in handy when Gilbert stopped next to him at the bar, where Mathias had been getting a water. Of course, Gilbert was completely drunk, so his words were slurred, and Mathias paid little attention until he heard something odd.

He rudely(not that Gilbert cared in his drunk state) cut Gilbert off and asked, "Wait, what was that?"

Gilbert blinked at him unevenly and tried to get his brain to repeat what he had just said. "I said I wish Jones wasn't such a goddamn prude all the time. Why can't he just ditch his boyfriend and be with me? What makes him so special?" The words were horribly slurred but the name was what caught his interest.

"Shones?" he said, "Who's that?" It sounded awfully familiar the way Gilbert said it. Gilbert furrowed his eyebrows. "Not Shones dumbass, Jones," he said, the words once again sounding slurred. "You just said the same thing. How drunk are you?" Mathias said.

"M'not drunk, just...tiippssy, a little. Not really."

"Yeah, that was super convincing," Mathias said sarcastically. "So who's this guy you're talking about?" He wasn't one for gossip but a drunk Gilbert was always pretty entertaining, though hard to understand.

"Oh, man, if you saw him you'd know what I'm talking about. Long legs, pretty eyes, fiery personality, pretty damn perfect if you ask me. Only problem is his no show boyfriend. Never even seen pictures of the guy."

That sounded...very familiar. Heart suddenly beating quickly he asked, "What's his name?"

"Alfred."

Though slightly slurred there was no mistaking the name. Alfred was here? In this city and friend's with Gilbert? It was then he realized the rest of Gilbert's words. Boyfriend?

"Alfred F. Jones?" he asked, numb as he stood there frozen. "Yep, that's him!" Gilbert said, then seemed to catch up on Mathias's addition to the name. "Wait, I never told you his middle name, how'd you know that?"

Completely ignoring the question, Mathias grabbed Gilbert's shoulders and said, "Gilbert, you have to tell me where he lives. Tell me Gilbert!"

"D-Dude, chill out. I'm gonna be sick or something with all your shaking." He abruptly yanked his hands off of Gilbert, acutely aware that he had indeed been shaking Gilbert in his hurry. "I'm sorry Gilbert, I just...can you tell me where he lives?"

Gilbert rubbed a hand across his face. "I dun know, at the college? Ask Luddy, or someone else; I'm too drunk for this."

Figuring as much, he went off to look for Ludwig, desperately hopping he wasn't busy with something. He needed to confirm it was  _his_  Alfred here, so close within reach. There were probably a lot of people with that name but he had to know.

Ludwig was standing by the bar on the other side of the room, one wriggling Italian brother to his right and another angrier Italian brother to his left. Poor guy just couldn't catch a break. He called out to Ludwig once close and asked if he knew a guy named Alfred Jones. He said yes, and when Mathias asked his address, saying he was an old friend who'd grown up with Alfred, Ludwig divulged it. With the information written down on a paper napkin, Mathias quietly slipped out of the club, running to the curb and trying to hail a taxi.

 _Damn this side of America,_  he thought, frustrated as taxi's drove by him. Finally one stopped in front of him and he jumped in, reading off the address on the napkin and leaning back in the seat to breath. Hopefully he wouldn't have to go far; He only had so much money on him.

* * *

It was late when Alfred was much more caught up with his work. He'd decided to watch a movie, as he wasn't that tired yet and hoped the movie would make his eyes tired so he would fall asleep faster.

Just as the movie got past its climax, someone knocked on his door. Looking over at the door and wondering who could be knocking at such a late hour, he paused the movie and got up, slowly approaching his door. There was no peep-hole so he's have to open the door to see.

He undid the lock and pulled the door open a little bit, then wider as he stared at the person standing there.

"M-Mathias?" Alfred whispered, completely shocked that this was happening. Was this real? Was he dreaming, having fallen asleep on his bed during the movie?  _Please don't let this be a dream._

Mathias was bent over, hands on his knees as he caught his breath. He looked up at Alfred's voice and smiled. Straightening out he replied, "Hi Alfred."

With a wide smile on his face, and tears starting to run down his cheeks, Alfred practically tackled Mathias as he hugged him, burying his face in Mathias's shoulder. This was real. This was real and it really was Mathias hugging him back.

Pulling away slightly, Mathias brought a hand up to wipe away the tears. Alfred let him undisturbed and asked, "What...How...What are you doing here?" He ushered Mathias into his dorm, shutting the door behind him and turning on the lights.

"Gilbert invited me down here to spend my birthday partying with him," Mathias said, eyes glancing over Alfred's room before returning to the blond. "When he mentioned you I had to come see you."

Alfred laughed, not even believing what was happening. "It was you he was doing that for?" He was just so happy to see Mathias. After all those years, to suddenly see him...it made him feel giddy and excited.

"Yeah, but he also mentioned a, um...a boyfriend?" Mathias asked reluctantly. If Alfred had moved on he didn't really want to talk about it. Alfred walked up to him shaking his head. "No, I don't have a boyfriend at the moment. When I got here I sort of told people I did have a boyfriend, even when I didn't. But I had just arrived and I wasn't ready to start a new relationship." He smiled at Mathias. "I used you as an excuse to not be with anyone. Even though I never told them your name it was you I thought about."

Mathias blinked at him. "Sooo, you don't have a boyfriend?"

"Nope!"

"Well then it is perfectly fine for me to do this."

Alfred was about to ask what when Mathias grabbed him and pulled him into a kiss. He was startled by the sudden move but of course returned it, gripping Mathias's hair and pressing them closer together. Mathias moved forward until Alfred's back hit a wall and they could go no farther. He ran his hands all over Alfred, kissing him roughly and with all the passion of lovers who had been kept from each other for years.

Alfred kissed back just as hard, whole being filled with warmth and heart pumping quickly.  _Mathias is here_ , he kept thinking, then lost his train of thought as Mathias moved away from his mouth and down his neck.

"W-Wait, wait, we sh-should—oh God yes right there—move this to my bed, d-don't you think?" Alfred said breathlessly. It was hard concentrating with all the attention to his neck but he managed.

"I think that is a wonderful idea," Mathias growled, then tugged Alfred to the bed, where they spent the rest of the night in each other's arm, intimately reacquainting themselves.

* * *

Arthur stood in front of Alfred's door, waiting for him to open it, as Arthur had already knocked quite a few times. He had a scowl on his face as he waited. Honestly, this kid was always so disorganized, he marveled at how well Alfred was doing in his classes. He would never be able to concentrate in such a messy environment.

He heard sound behind the door, voices and laughing, then the door being unlocked. Was there someone in there with Alfred? Why so early?

Alfred opened the door, but by his appearance he was nowhere near ready to go to breakfast with Arthur and Francis, as he did every Sunday morning. He had on boxers and an inside out shirt. His hair was messier than normal and Arthur could have sworn he saw dark marks around the base of Alfred's neck, just barely covered by the shirt. What the hell?

"Oh this is great; I've been waiting out here and you're not even ready to go!" Arthur said, glaring at Alfred.

Alfred laughed nervously and scratched his head. "Yeah, sorry Arthur but I can't make it to breakfast today. Got a lot of work, ya' know? Anyway see you later!" Then he shut the door and locked it.

Arthur blinked for several seconds at the door, then turned and walked down the hall to the stairs. Francis was going to get a kick out of this.

* * *

"Do you wanna go out to breakfast or something?" Alfred asked. He and Mathias were lying on his bed and watching tv. He'd had the best night of sleep in a while, and waking up had been just as great, since he had someone he cared about so much with him. Plus, he got morning sex too.

"I dunno, are you hungry? I'm kinda hungry," Mathias answered. Alfred hummed then jumped up and started pulling some clothes on. Mathias watched him with a confused expression. "Come on," Alfred said, buckling his belt then throwing a jacket on, "I'm hungry and I know the perfect place."

Mathias chuckled and stood up, finding his scattered clothes and putting them back on. He'd have to return to Gilbert's to get a new change of clothes. Hopefully Gilbert would be passed out drunk and only Ludwig would be there. He had a feeling Ludwig would react better to his situation than Gilbert.

"Alright, let's go," Mathias said, slinging an arm around Alfred's shoulders. "Lead on." They walked out into the hall and Alfred locked his door before they started making their way to the ground floor. "I don't have a car or anything but it's not very far," Alfred said. "That's fine," Mathias said, in an off handed way. He'd never seen such a large city in person, and he was amazed by all the architecture and people. He dropped his arm from Alfred's shoulder once they were out of the building and on the sidewalk, which was packed with people. How did anyone live in such a crowded place?

The walk was, thankfully, shorter than he'd expected, and soon he was following Alfred into what looked like a diner. They were seated quickly, much to Mathias's amazement(seriously, where did all these people come from?), and the waitress gave them their menus before hurriedly scurrying off.

When he picked out what he wanted(something small and on the cheaper side) he looked up to see Alfred smiling widely at him. He returned it.

"Do you remember our first date?" Alfred asked him. Mathias set his menu down and glanced around the diner...Diner. Of course.

"Yeah, it was at a place like this right? The only restaurant in town where two kids could hang out together by themselves. I remember being nervous, but it turned out okay in the end, didn't it?" True to his word, Mathias had been very nervous about going on a date with Alfred, and their first date no less! He had every right to be nervous, but he and Alfred were such good friends that it hadn't been awkward at all, but rather pleasant.

"Yes, this place reminds me a lot about home," Alfred said, looking around before focusing on Mathias, "but I prefer this," he placed his hand on Mathias's, "much more."

.:(~*w*)~:.

_The sky was clear that night, and the stars were bright. A blanket lay between them and the grass, with another shared between them for warmth. Despite the layers of clothes they were wearing it was still freezing cold outside; just the perfect excuse to cuddle, not that either of them minded._

_Alfred's gaze was transfixed on the stars, his happiness and fascination with the burning balls of gas clearly seen on his face and in his smile. Mathias's gaze often switched between the stars and Alfred, as the stars could not outshine his boyfriend._

_Alfred caught his gaze and smiled at him, snuggling closer and kissing him. The kiss was sweet and chaste, and it was killing Mathias to know that, in a few days time, Alfred would be gone and he might never get to share these moments with him ever again._

" _I love you," Alfred whispered, "I will always love you."_

_Mathias shifted his arm to start running his hand through Alfred's bright blond hair._

" _And I will always love you more."_


End file.
